Failure doesn't mean you are stupid, a loser, unable, an imposter, or should be featured in a viral video doing bicep curls in the squat rack. In our world (by “our world” I am referring to me, you and everyone else looking to make positive changes to our health and/or fitness) it usually means 1 thing:
We tried something and the plan wasn’t right for the task.
It does not mean:
We didn't try but told ourselves we did and now find ourselves searching for a way to rationalize.
This is NOT failure. This is self-deception. A completely different thing.
Failure is a mismatch of effort to expectations.
If you want to achieve *insert goal here* you’ll almost certainly need to make sacrifices and better choices that will require a plan and effort. Your expectations here should be that change takes time and sacrifice is necessary. Your effort here should be consistent and well structured.
I spoke to a member recently who has every reason imaginable to achieve his goal, coupled with every reason why he can’t make it happen. He's currently in a state of self-deception. I would rather he “fail”.
Failure would mean he is trying. It would mean he is thinking about his goals. Paying attention to his needs. Taking responsibility for his actions. Trying to find the right combination of exercise, nutrition and recovery techniques that work for him.
Failure is treated like a dirty word in the health and fitness world. Something to be embarrassed by and hidden. Instead, it should be part of the plan. You won't fail too many more times if you keep adjusting expectations and effort accordingly. Eventually, you will run out of ways to mismatch effort -> expectations and failure will be the magic thing you use to tweak and battle test your next steps.
Stop self-deceiving and start failing more often and you will soon find yourself living a better existence.